By Camila De La Cruz
I'll be honest, I hadn't watched a single episode of Love Island, or any other dating show for that matter, before writing this article. Although I do enjoy some competition reality shows, like The Voice or Lego Masters, dating shows have never been my thing. That said, Love Island was just too popular for me to ignore. I was curious about the hype, so I downloaded 9Now and watched the pilot episode of Love Island UK.
Frankly, it was super boring. Maybe that’s because I’ve never been too invested in TV shows, so it is hard to find something that I do enjoy, or perhaps years of hearing my parents complain about the prevalence of The Bachelor at their workplace led me to have a negative perception of dating shows. Despite this, it’s a completely different story at Loreto. Anyone who was at Loreto in 2019 will remember the absolute chokehold Love Island had on students. Although I think Love Island was Loreto’s favourite, there are just so many dating shows out there on every streaming platform, with a range of crazy and sometimes questionable premises, and it still raises the question of "how did dating shows become so popular and are they as problematic as they seem to be?"
Why Dating Shows?
Dating shows have captivated audiences for a variety of reasons. Described as a “genius formula” by Cosmopolitan Magazine, they combine elements of romantic movies and TV shows, with the drama and excitement of reality shows. With both genres being highly successful, there is no doubt that dating shows would be globally beloved.
I think there’s also an element of curiosity that plays into the appeal of dating shows, particularly with shows like Married at First Sight. We’re curious to know what it would be like if we said “I do” to a complete stranger. There’s also the FOMO that brings dating shows to the screens of people who aren’t even interested in them - like me.
Dating shows are very repetitive. Although every show has a different premise, they all have the same tried-and-tested formula. Really, it's like a lot of romance movies. We just like to turn off our minds for a few hours and watch a show with the comfort of already knowing how it will pan out.
That’s not to say that dating shows have no drama in them - it’s VERY much the opposite. Reality shows are known to have some very spicy drama to keep viewers hooked. “Who cheated on who?” “Do they like this person or this other person?” “There’s no way they could do that to them.” It’s like gossiping with your friends, and you can gossip about these shows with your friends and others online.
Criticisms of Dating Shows
We’ve all heard of the endless criticisms of reality TV, let alone dating shows. A common one is that, although they are called 'reality shows', they don’t depict reality at all. That’s fair for most (if not all) dating shows. It’s not like you’ll go to a random island in the middle of nowhere and find the love of your life, along with a bunch of strangers by chance - I think that’s a given. Like a lot of reality TV, dating shows hire many actors as contestants so that scenes can be scripted to be dramatised further. We may never know what happens behind the scenes in these shows unless we work in a network producing a show, or as a contestant. Former behind-the-scenes staff and contestants have said different things about the authenticity of filming, so this largely depends on each network (my favourite criticism is from Reddit user SirLoremIpsum who said, “They filmed the ‘getting on the taxi after being fired’ on day one”, about The Apprentice UK).
In reality, if you understand that what you’re seeing isn’t realistic, none of the above is problematic. Although yes, you could argue that contestants should be aware of the potential for backlash when signing up for a reality show, it’s hard to ignore that the show will actually benefit from bad press. For reality shows, any attention, good or bad, is better than none. Therefore, the network does actively look down on particular contestants, so people can talk about them after watching the show.
Another point is that many dating shows display a range of unhealthy things to an impressionable audience. For one thing, dating shows often show unrealistic depictions of bodies, which can be problematic if an audience isn’t aware that they are unrealistic.
Many shows also are very heteronormative, neurotypical, and portray some gender stereotypes. This is changing though. Shows like I Kissed a Boy and The Ultimation: Queer Love are part of a growing number of queer dating shows out there. Not to mention the growing number of neurodivergent dating shows like Love on the Spectrum. This is definitely a great shift.
Final Thoughts
In the end, I think that if you’re aware of the problematic nature of these shows and don’t watch Love Island as some sort of dating manual (and put schoolwork before, as the Year 7 advisors would say), then go ahead and watch all the dating shows you want.
I would say, however, that dating shows are just not for me, and I may just have not found the right show for me yet.
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